Random Distractions
conversation at work
i work at a halloween haunted house park
Guy who works in a haunted house: The best part about working in the haunted house is when girls go under the black-light.
Me: Yeah? Why's that?
Guy: If they're wearing a white bra, you can see it glow! Haha like why would you wear a white bra to this place?
Me: uh
Me: i dont get it
Guy: you can see their bras. Its funny.
Me: did you not know girls wear bras? Did you not know girl's have breasts?
Some girl walking past: What? We have... Hold on *looks down shirt* WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT
some other boy: HOLY SHIT what the FUCK is under your SHIRT?
girl: I DONT KNOw? BREASTS APPARENTLY??
other boy: *SCREAMING*
girl: *SCREAMING*
me: *SCREAMING*
first boy: uh fine whatever fine i get it jesus christ
did-you-kno:

That isn’t a butterfly in your stomach, it’s your 2nd brain. There are more neurons lining your gut than there are in your spinal cord so your digestive system can work without needing your brain. When you’re flooded with emotion, the neurons react and you get a “gut feeling.”  Source

did-you-kno:

That isn’t a butterfly in your stomach, it’s your 2nd brain. There are more neurons lining your gut than there are in your spinal cord so your digestive system can work without needing your brain. When you’re flooded with emotion, the neurons react and you get a “gut feeling.” Source

fuckyeahprettybooks:

I am sorry for the non-book related post but its been 10 minutes and I am still laughing.

fenchurchdent:

robothugscomic:

New comic!

Yeah, I might have watched a movie and gotten kind of mad.

This is seriously a trope I’d love to never see again though.

Did you mean “Wanted”????

iworkfornickfury:

dearjacquelinee:

sometimes i think i miss high school and then..this is pretty accurate

one time i was in class in middle school and i was eating a beef jerky slim jim and the teacher said “stop eating that unless you have enough to share” so i pulled out a box of 200 slim jims (from costco of course) and the teacher fucking confiscated it.

iworkfornickfury:

dearjacquelinee:

sometimes i think i miss high school and then..this is pretty accurate

one time i was in class in middle school and i was eating a beef jerky slim jim and the teacher said “stop eating that unless you have enough to share” so i pulled out a box of 200 slim jims (from costco of course) and the teacher fucking confiscated it.

halcyon-ia:

break the rules

halcyon-ia:

break the rules

lameboob:

lameboob:

lameboob:

how do you make someone holy

you beat the hell out of them

my 96 year old catholic grandma told me this joke


A wild shadow appears!
A wild shadow appears!